Just Think About It
by xxEllieJellyxx
Summary: This is mainly going to focus on Marley's eating disorder, so it does involve anorexia/bulimia. Future Ryley, or possibly Jarley.. comment which one you want! :)
1. Chapter 1

**Hey okay I wrote this chapter a while ago, but I hope you like this-it's going to mainly be about Marley's eating disorder and it starts from the "Glease" episode…So yeah please review if you like it and if you want me to continue with it!**

"Just because you didn't love yourself enough to binge and purge." She looks me right in the eye as she starts to walk out. "Just think about it."

I'm left alone in Kitty's bathroom as she closes the door. I look in the mirror-I don't look as if I've gained weight do I? As I continue to look, I see things I hadn't noticed before. Maybe my stomach _does_ stick out a little bit, and my hips were never this big. No wonder my Sandy costume won't fasten anymore, I'm _huge! _Kitty's right-I do have a fat gene, I can't believe I never ever noticed before. Everyone's probably been laughing at me this whole time.

I kneel down on her tiled floor and stare down at the water inside the porcelain bowl. 'Come on' I think to myself, 'It's the only way-do it for Sandy.' I take my third and fourth fingers from my right hand and push them down my throat. I move them around, searching for a gag reflex. After almost a minute of retching and forcing my fingers further and further down my throat, I finally puke.

Coughing, I rub my eyes with the back of my hand and stare down at the mess that I've practically just clawed out of my own stomach. 'What have I done?!' I think. Watching all those health videos, seeing all those leaflets about bulimia-I never imagined that'd be me. I never thought I'd be insecure enough to resort to this. I get to my feet, flush the toilet and look in the mirror once more.

I look terrible. My eyes are watering, making the little mascara that I'd put on this morning run, and my face is flushed. I hurriedly splash my face with water and open the door, promising myself that I'll keep my hands off the food. I step into Kitty's bedroom, hoping the others hadn't heard me, and am surprised by what I see. The girls are all wearing wigs which they hastily pull off as they notice me. That's when I notice Kitty-who's wearing a wig the same colour and length of my hair, and the newsies cap that I'd put in my bag.

"Are you making fun of me Kitty?" I ask hesitantly, not really wanting to know the answer.

"Some people are so touchy." She replies, rolling her eyes. I stand there confused. 'Why would she be laughing at me?' I think. Then suddenly it hits me-because I'm fat. Why else?

I barely remember the rest of the night, except trying to resist all the food. I wake up in the morning and look around at the unfamiliar surroundings, trying to figure out where I am. I remember when I see Kitty lying on a camp bed next to me in her thin nightgown. She's so skinny, it's not fair. But now that she's told me her secret-maybe I can be too. I know it'll take a while-but it'll be worth it when I start losing.

**Please leave any feedback-if you like it and want me to continue, or if you have any ideas on how I could improve :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi-well here's chapter two, I hope you like it! Please comment if you want me to update, or if you have any ideas! Also, please tell me if you want Ryley or Jarley-so far there has been two votes for Jarley! Thanks to everyone who's added this story to their alerts and favourites, and everyone who's reviewed! Oh and in this chapter, Kitty mentions something that is included in my "Never Have I Ever" story too.**

I sit up, staring enviously at Kitty's perfect legs. I swear, she has like no body fat anywhere. Just as I'm thinking about how I'll get through today without eating anything, she stirs, and turns to face me, opening her eyes.

"Oh hey Marley." She says sleepily, getting out of her lying down position. She rubs her eyes tiredly. "What time is it?"

I reach out for my phone and unlock it. "8;27" I read aloud.

"Kay, thanks. We are the only one's awake-right?" She asks me. I look around.

"Yeah I think so."

"Good." She says, smiling at me. "Now Marley, I think we need to have this conversation now-before the others wake up."

I look at her blankly, trying to figure out what she means.

"I mean about what I told you last night." She explains, noticing my confused expression. "Did you manage to, you know, do it?"

I nod slowly. So _that's _what she means.

"I'm so proud of you Marls!" she tells me, giving me a hug. "It isn't easy the first time, but the more you do it-the easier it gets."

I smile at her, glad that we're now friends. "Yeah it took me a few minutes to get anything up, but I do feel better-thinner." I reply.

"And you look it too!" she exclaims. "I'm just so glad to have someone else, someone who knows what it's like, someone just like me! It'll be so much easier if we're going to go through this together, especially after I've had to do it alone for so long"

"How long _have_ you been doing it?" I ask tentatively.

She pauses for a few moments before responding. "Well I first started feeling self conscious when I was thirteen," she begins sadly. "I started to hate my appearance and couldn't even look in the mirror for any length of time, so I started to skip meals and go out for jogs, nothing very drastic. But then I got a boyfriend-Kyle. He told me that I was gaining weight and suggested some ways for me to lose it again. I began to throw up after every meal and made hundreds of excuses to not eat. We're not together anymore, but I know that he was telling me the truth. I _was _fat. And I still am. And I've just been feeling so alone since I came here."

I can't believe that this is Kitty talking. I mean, she's _Kitty Wilde. _Head cheerleader, most popular girl in school, why would she be self conscious? And if she thinks that she's fat-then what does that make me?

"I'm so sorry Kitty." I tell her, and I do mean it. At least she was kind when she told me her secret. This Kyle just seems like an ass. "At least you're not alone anymore."

"You're right." She says, "But first things first, I need to teach you the basics."

"The basics?" I ask her. "Basics of what?"

"This." She responds simply. "You don't want anyone else to find out about our diet do you?"

I shake my head in response. My mom would be devastated if she found out, I mean I love her-but I don't want to end up looking like her!

"Well then," she continues. "There are some things you need to know. Like don't be too obvious when skipping meals. Lunch in school is easy enough, you can pretend that you had to see a teacher and you grabbed a sandwich or something, or just buy something small and make it look like you're eating it. You should really try not to though, it's horrible trying to purge in school, there's nearly always other people in the bathroom."

"But what about at home?" I ask, knowing my mom would notice if I wasn't eating.

"Well at mealtimes drink plenty of water, and take a sip in between each mouthful. Also, have a gulp of milk or diet coke after you've eaten something-it makes it easier to bring back up. It's best to do it with the shower running, so you can't be heard." She tells me.

Just then, Unique pushes off her blanket and sits up, as does Brittany.

"Morning!" Brittany says brightly. I can't for the life of me understand how she can be so enthusiastic all the time. "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing." Kitty replies quickly. "Just Glee and what songs we should perform at Sectionals."

I marvel at her quick thinking. She's a lot better at lying than me!

**Thanks for reading-I hope you enjoyed it! Special thanks to all the reviewers….**

**FicTranslator: Thank you for commenting-and thanks! I'm really happy that you think it's good :) And I thought that someone should write about Marley's eating disorder because the way Glee handled it really annoyed me! I mean, she was bulimic one episode, then wearing the shortest, skimpiest outfits the next! But I love her character though, and hope she'll be in the next season. **

**Forevergleek1299: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it :D Thanks for commenting!**

**Guest: Aw thanks! And thank you for reviewing! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi, hope you like this chapter! Please comment if you want an update and if you do I'll try and post a new chapter tomorrow but like I said on my other story it's my birthday then (yay!) so I'm not sure if I'll be able to…but if you guys want another chapter then I'll try! Please leave any ideas-and if you want Ryley (2 points so far) or Jarley (6 points so far). Also it won't sound like it, but I do actually love "My Cup", and this chapter is in Kitty's POV but it'll probably just be this one..I don't know please comment if you really want a chapter in a different person's point of view!**

**Kitty's POV…**

I smile at Brittany, hoping she believes me. She should do-I've been lying to her and the others since I moved here.

"Cool!" she exclaims. "We should definitely do my song, it's called My Cup" she starts to sing this awful song whilst Unique and I share a confused look. I notice that Marley is looking sadly at Brittany's stomach and I recognise the jealousy-I feel it too.

Brittany's singing wakes up Sugar and Tina who sit up and start to clap along. After she's finished the last line she bows dramatically and everyone applauds, the sudden noise waking Marley from her daze.

"Hey Kitty when do you eat breakfast?" Tina asks me. "I'm starving."

"Oh yeah baby-Unique is one _hungry _diva!" Unique calls out, and Sugar and Brittany nod.

"Well we can go make something now if you want?" I say, avoiding the question. I haven't eaten breakfast in the last two years.

"Perfect!" Sugar squeals, jumping to her feet. "Let's go get some food!"

Everyone scrambles to their feet and follows her down the stairs excitedly. I roll my eyes. How can they be this happy about _food?!_ All it does is make you fat and.. I lose my trail of thought when I see the look on Marley's face.

"It'll be fine." I whisper, looking around to check everyone's gone downstairs. Just then, I hear Tina call me from the kitchen.

"Hey Kitty-is it okay to make pancakes?!" she shouts. I sigh.

"Sure!" I reply and walk towards the door to go and help. I turn back to Marley before leaving. "Don't worry."

As I get downstairs I see Sugar holding a frying pan. "Hey Kitty-how many do you and Marley want?" she asks.

"None for me thanks," I turn to see Marley coming inside. "I'm feeling sick after all that junk food last night!"

"Kay kay," Sugar says. "What about you Kitty?"

"None for me thanks Sugar." I reply. "I'm allergic to eggs. I'll just get something else."

"Oh okay then," she tells me. I wink at Marley approvingly. Considering she's new at this-that wasn't such a bad lie.

"So what do you wanna do today guys?" I ask when we've all sat down-me and Marley with just a glass of water.

"I've got a date with Sam soon." Says Brittany through a mouthful of pancake.

"And I have one with Mike." Tina declares happily. "We're going to try again!"

I smile at them both, but I'm trying not to scream. I haven't had a date since Jake dumped me and I know it's because I'm fat.

**Thanks for reading! Please review if you want more :)**

**To the six Guest reviews (including Rhea and Macdaddy) : Thanks for reviewing, and for you feedback! Hope you liked this chapter too :D**

**forevergleek1299:Thank you! I'm glad you like it, and thanks for reviewing! :) I'm not sure if they will be friends, cause I've had ideas that work either way, so I just don't know yet ;)**

**FicTranslator: Yes, I know quite a lot of people that really related to Marley and I think her plot did deserve a bit more attention, especially as they just left it with Mercedes. But also there's been hints about Santana having an eating disorder, like in chapter three Mercedes says to her "Oh like you eat!" and she doesn't reply, she just looks away so I think that could have been expanded on. Thanks for your feedback and for commenting!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey-hope you like this chapter! Please comment if you want more, and please check out my new story "I Just Need Someone To Turn To" and tell me if you like it! (And it's my birthday so surely that counts for something?!) Please review which pairing you'd prefer-there's 6 votes for Jarley and 4 for Ryley xo**

**Marley's POV….**

I sit at Kitty's table sipping some water. I watch, mesmerised as Sugar eats her pancake, it's so unfair. She's so thin yet I doubt she's ever had to stick her fingers down her throat to feel good about herself. I can hear my stomach rumbling quietly but no-one seems to notice except Kitty who gives me a small, encouraging smile.

"I'm meeting up with Joe," Sugar says, licking her lips. "He wants to take me to his inter-religion paintball match."

"And Unique is going to go shopping for new dresses-care to join me my fellow single ladies?" Unique says, turning to me and Kitty.

"Erm, I'm not really sure," I say. I love Unique, and I know that she wouldn't judge me but I don't want to make my weight gain obvious to anyone by trying to force myself into clothes that'll be far too tight.

"Come on girls!" she pleads. "You can't make me go by myself!"

"Okay, but I've got like no money at the moment so I won't be buying anything-_or _trying anything on. It's too tempting! "Kitty tells her, putting a grape into her mouth out of a packet on the side. She is convincing-I'm going to have to ask her for more tips. "Well I'm going to go get dressed while you all finish your food. There's fruit over there if you're still hungry" she says, pointing to the bowl near the bread bin.

A few moments later, I follow her up the stairs, telling the others that I'm going to the bathroom. As I approach her bedroom door I hear a retching noise coming from the bathroom. I hesitantly open the door to see Kitty kneeling on the floor with tears streaming down her face.

"Kitty?" I ask, coming closer. "You haven't eaten anything-why are you doing it?"

Kitty turns to look at me, staring at me like I'm mad. "Those _grapes_ Marley! Fruit! Full of sugar. You don't understand I don't eat fruit. I can't just leave it and let everyone watch me grow fatter and fatter!" She shoves her fingers back down and I look away. I didn't realise that a few grapes could do this much harm. No wonder I've gotten so big-I've been so naïve and stupid. Stuffing my face with "healthy" foods thinking they won't cause any harm, when they obviously will!

**Thanks for reading! Sorry it's short but if you want more I promise they'll be longer!**

**Clara Valentina: Thank you! I'm really happy you like it :D And thanks for reviewing!**

**Angelina Johnson: Thank you for commenting and for your feedback!**

**FicTranslator: The only reason I remember the Santana part is because I hoped that they'd do a storyline about it, and that there'd be a character that so many people could relate to. That's why I was happy that they did it with Marley because I have gone through it and when there was a someone going through the same thing that many others have, it made me and I'm sure lots of other fans feel less alone but that's also why it annoyed me-because parts were quite unrealistic :(Thanks for reviewing and I'm glad it made you laugh-I could just imagine Unique saying it :') **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey-hope you like this chapter, please comment if you want more! Jarley-7 points. Ryley-4 points.**

**Kitty's POV…**

I hate having to purge in front of anyone but at least Marley understands. I can't believe I ate those grapes. I can feel them inside my stomach as I heave once more. When I can't get anything else up I rest against the bath. Marley turns to look at me again, her face softening as I wipe my tears away. She comes closer and flushes the toilet for me.

"I'm sorry for shouting Marley," I say-my voice breaking. "And for doing this in front of view I just had to get them out.

She kneels down beside me, and puts her arm around my shoulder. "It's fine-we're in this together right?"She smiles down at me and stands, offering me her hand. "We need to go get dressed or the others will be wondering what's happened to us." I nod, and let her pull me up. I'm surprised she manages it-I must weigh at least double what she does.

We walk into my bedroom and I go over to my wardrobe as she starts rooting through her bag. I pull out a pair of denim shorts but put them back sadly. I can't have my legs on display somewhere full of people! I find a pair of leggings but return them too. I don't want anything clinging that close to my gelatinous body. Eurgh. A pair of old blue jeans falls out and I pick them up. Perfect! I withdraw a white t-shirt and baggy sweatshirt-the ideal outfit to cover myself up.

I turn to see Marley tugging on a pair of black skinny jeans, sighing. "These fit perfectly the other week!" she exclaims, trying desperately to pull them up further. "I don't understand how I could have gained that much weight so quickly."

She moves her hands and I can see her waist. I can't stop staring-she's so much thinner than me. If I was just a bit slimmer than her I'd be perfect. _Flawless._ "You look fine Marley!" I tell her. "Better than I will anyways. You can't have gained that much."

She looks at me disbelievingly as I walk into my bathroom to change. I don't want her to see my body the poor girl would probably never recover. I hurriedly change, avoiding the mirror, and walk out to find Marley brushing her hair with Unique (who is now dressed in a pale blue sundress)sitting on my bed beside her.

"Hey Kitty, is that what you're wearing?" Unique asks, seemingly confused.

"Yeah-why?" I answer, looking down. "Does it look that bad?"

"No-no" she says. "It's just you seem so comfortable in your Cheerio's uniform-I thought you'd prefer outfits similar to that."

I smile in reply. "Well I normally do love those kind of clothes," I lie. "But today I'm just feeling kinda cold." I can't _stand _that uniform. It shows my fat arms and my legs. The only good thing about it is that it helps suck my middle in.

I hear footsteps coming up the stairs and turn to see Sugar, Brittany and Tina coming into my bedroom. "Hey!" Brittany says, as they all start to change without a care. "The guys have come to pick us up so sorry but we're going to have to go. Thanks for having us!" I try not to show any envy as Brittany shows off her totally flat stomach and slim legs.

"Anytime" I reply, smiling. The three race back down calling out their thanks.

"Well shall we go then girls?" asks Unique. "It's best to go to the mall before twelve cause it ends up getting crowded near lunch-time and you can barely breath!" We make our way to the front door and I grab my handbag with my purse and keys inside off the kitchen counter.

I lock the front door behind us and we get to my car before Unique realises that she's left her purse in my bedroom. I give her my keys and she runs back inside as me and Marley climb into the car, me in front of the wheel and Marley in the passenger seat.

"Kitty.." Marley begins quietly. "I don't know how I'm going to do this. I feel so empty, yet fat at the same time, and it's only been a few hours. How can you do it?"

My heart softens. "It isn't that bad," I reassure her. "Some days are harder than others, but it really isn't too hard. Just drink a lot of water and ask me if you need help. Oh and also; after you purge, don't brush your teeth. Apparently it rubs the acid around your teeth-just gargle with some mouthwash so no one can smell vomit on your breath. But if you're going out for a meal or something, it's easier to take a small packet of mints-but you can't take too many of them obviously."

"Thanks" she says, "Really. Thank you" Just then Unique scrambles into the back of the car and hands me the keys.

"Kay let's go!" I say with a false brightness. I'm really dreading this.

**Thanks for reading! Please review for more :)**

**taaytaay8: Thanks for reviewing and for your feedback!:) **

**FicTranslator: Thank you! And I'm not sure when people will start to notice but it'll probably be soon! Thanks for commenting :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey everyone-sorry it's been ages since I last updated, I have been kind of un-inspired and **_**really **_**busy :( Hope you enjoy! Please leave feedback :D (Oh and I live in England so I don't know many American shops except like Forever 21 so I don't know if all the shops I might mention are in America too)**

**Kitty's POV…**

"We're here!" Unique exclaims enthusiastically. "Come on my girls- let's go!"

"Yay!" I reply dryly, getting out of the car. She doesn't seem to notice the sarcasm in my voice as she heads towards the mall doors, me and Marley following slowly behind her. She heads straight towards River Island and I roll my eyes. Great.

"What do you think of this?" she asks, holding up a gorgeous dark purple bodycon dress. If it was me, I'd buy it. It's possibly the most beautiful dress I've seen; sexy but still not slutty. I'm way too fat to wear anything even slightly clingy though so I know I couldn't wear anything even slightly like that.

"It's nice." I tell her, smiling. "You should try it on." Marley nods in agreement but doesn't say anything.

"Kay kay!" she says brightly, picking up two other similar dresses. "I'll come out in whichever colour I think looks best." She explains, gesturing at the black, purple and blue garments in her hands, as she enters one of the stalls to change.

**Marley's POV…**

"How can you stand this?" I ask Kitty quietly. "Being around all these clothes, and yet not even being tempted to try anything on? Just a few weeks ago I was messing about with everyone, trying on all the cloths, even though I knew I'd never be able to buy them. It's taking all my willpower to stop myself from twirling around in these dresses and skirts."

"Because I know how bad I'd look if I did wear them." She explains, but I can see the longing in her eyes as she looks around at the numerous racks around us.

Just then, Unique comes back out of the cubicle, wearing the purple dress. "Voila! Unique has made her choice! What do you think?"

"It looks really nice." I tell her, and it's the truth. Her confidence just makes her look perfect. I wish I could be as comfortable in my body.

Just a few more pounds, I tell myself. Then I will be.

"Glad you like it!" she exclaims. "I'll put my other clothes back on and pay and then we can go to Topshop, New Look and American Apparel if we've got time!" She turns and retreats back inside the stall as me and Kitty groan in unison.

"Yay." She says dryly. "At least Unique's having a good time though; that dress did look gorgeous on her."

We spend the next three hours walking around every single clothes shop in the mall- finishing with Primark- when Unique turns to us, holding about six shopping bags.

"Now who's hungry?!" she asks brightly. "You must be; you didn't have anything before we left, and the food court's only over there. It'll be my treat." She gestures over to the collection of stores and starts to walk over, dragging us behind her.

"I'm actually not." I say desperately as she stops by the muffin stall. "I really don't want anything."

"Hm. Sure you don't." she says disbelievingly. "I know my best friend and you always have room for muffins from here!" I don't know what to say and just look to Kitty but she's staring blankly into the distance. "We'll have three oat and raisin muffins and three bottles of water please." Says Unique to the lady behind the counter.

"Okay, it should be ready in a minute." The woman replies. "Just go sit at one of the tables and it'll be brought right over."

I mumble my thanks as Unique hands the money over and follow her to a table, which is fortunately quite near the bathroom. We don't have to wait long before the tray is brought over with our food on. Unique tucks in straight away, not noticing me taking tiny bites between gulps of water. I look over to where Kitty's sitting and notice that, half of her muffin has gone, just like Unique's. I look at her confusedly as she gestures to her napkin before throwing it into a bin that's a few centimetres away from us.

Unique then turns to look at her so we both take a big bite reluctantly, but then her phone rings.

"Hello? Unique's here." She says. "Oh hey Sugar, yes I'm with Kitty and Marls…. Yeah in the Cherry-tree…. I don't… erm I'm not sure…" Kitty stands up and, after pointing to the door and mouthing, walks into the restroom. I get up quickly and follow her, leaving Unique still talking on the phone.

**Thanks to everyone for reviewing! Please leave any comments :D Oh and if anyone wants to help me with this story, please message me! We could write like alternate chapters or something because I've been really busy x**

**FicTranslator: Yeah, I guess. I do love their friendship in the show though!**

** .35: Okay thank you!**

**Umpadee: Thanks for reviewing and here's the next chapter!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it's been ages since I last updated! Please review and I'll update faster, I've almost finished the next chapter and if I get some comments in the next few hours I'll be able to upload it tonight :) Hope you enjoy!**

**Marley's POV…**

"Kitty?" I say tentatively, opening the bathroom door and walking in. It seems empty but soon enough the silence is interrupted by a coughing. Following the sound, I walk over to the end cubicle and stand outside the door. "Kitty?"

"I'm here." She croaks as I push the door open; she'd forgotten to lock it. I see her crouched on the floor, her back against the wall and her eyes streaming. I can't believe how awful she looks. Her eyes are bloodshot, her whole face is damp, and there is a spot of what looks like blood near her lips.

I reach over to flush the chain before sitting next to her and can't help but gasp when I see the amount of red mixed in with the regurgitated food.

"Oh my gosh Kitty… are you okay?" I ask. This can't be normal, and she didn't look this bad this morning, now she just looks so… so helpless and frail.

"I don't know Marls." She answers, her voice dry and husky. "There was blood, and not just a little." I reach over and pull her into a hug, not knowing what to say. I'd wanted to get rid of my muffin too and I could feel it sitting in my stomach, my body absorbing all the fat, but I knew I couldn't just leave her.

"Marley? Kitty?" I hear Unique's unmistakeable voice and the creaking of the door as footsteps near our cubicle. "Are you in here?"

"Yeah, just a sec." calls Kitty, clearing her throat.

"Kay kay babes, I'll go back to the table." She replies and I can hear her walk out again. I breathe a sigh of relief.

"That was too close." I say and Kitty nods in reply before scrambling to her feet. We walk over to the sinks together and Kitty bursts into a fresh set of tears when she sees her reflection.

"Oh friggin 'hell… I look terrible." She sobs, raking her fingers through her hair. I pull down some hand towels and run the cold water over them before dabbing her eyes and wiping her mouth. I then take my eyeliner and lipgloss out of my pocket and reapply her make-up.

"Voila!" I exclaim, stepping away after a few moments. "You look just as gorgeous as ever."

"Thanks Marley." She says softly, smiling at me. "Really.. thanks. Well we should probably get back out there. I don't normally take this long but I couldn't keep that inside me for a second longer and I was just so surprised at the.. the.." she trails off and stares in the distance. I stand there awkwardly until she catches my eye again. "Sorry, let's go."

She turns on her heel and stalks out, her head held high. I marvel at how easily she can switch from a broken- looking girl to Kitty Wide: Head Bitch.

I follow her lead and return to my seat beside her, feeling Unique's eyes on us.

"You two okay?"

"Mhmm. I'm just feeling kinda sick." Kitty tells her, before gesturing to the remainder her muffin. "Do you want this?" Unique shakes her head so she wraps it up in another napkin and throws that in the bin too. I discretely do the same before swallowing another mouthful of water.

"Shall we go?" I ask Unique, anxious to be somewhere with less food.

"Yeah okay then.." She replies, raising her eyebrows. I know she must be surprised that I'm so anxious to leave when I usually stay here for hours.

**Please comment for faster, longer (and probably a lot better) updates! And a shout-out to the two Guests, Gleeotch13, Avengergirl and Jane 612 for reviewing last chapter! Thank you :) And next chapter things will start moving a lot faster!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey I'm really sorry it's been so long since the last update but I didn't get that many reviews so I was kinda discouraged and didn't have many ideas :( But anyways in this chapter you will see some Ryley :) Thanks to everyone who left their preference and please review if you'd like me to post more or if you have any feedback/ideas! Possibly a bit of swearing in this chapter..**

**(A time jump here to the next Monday-a week and a day after last chapter)**

**Ryder's POV…**

I walk down the hallway, expecting to see Marley waiting for me by my locker like she said she would, but she isn't there. I look around worriedly, wondering where she could be, but presume that she's okay and must just have been kept behind after class. After putting in my combination, my locker swings open and I stuff my bag inside. I wait for another minute and then see Marley running towards me.

It's amazing to see her again; I've missed her a lot due to me being off last week and seeing a dyslexia specialist. I smile at her, she looks exactly the same. But, as she gets closer, I see that there's something different but I can't put my finger on it. She wraps her arms around me and squeals, making all my suspicions go away.

"Sorry I'm late! Oh my gosh, I've missed you so much Ry!" she tells me excitedly. "I'm so glad you're back!"

"I've missed you too Marls." I reply softly and our lips meet for what starts out as a kiss between a reunited boyfriend and girlfriend but after a few moments I notice that her lips feel dry and her tongue tastes different. I pull back, frowning.

"Marley," I begin as she stares up at me, her eyes seemingly confused. "What was the last thing you ate?"

**Marley's POV..**

Crap. He must be suspicious. I thought I'd covered my tracks; I used mouthwash, reapplied my makeup, including my lipgloss, and made sure I didn't get any vomit in my hair.

"Er..I had some.. erm.. fruit for breakfast?" I lie, trying to convince myself more than him. I've avoided breakfast and lunch for the past week and managed to puke after every dinner with Mom, I think I can see a difference. Like my skinny jeans don't feel as tight anymore and my stomach seems a bit smaller. There's still a long way to go of course, but with Kitty's help I think I might actually get there- to perfection.

He doesn't seem to believe me but he nods anyway. "Okay then, let's go get some lunch." He says, his arm around me.

"Kay kay." I answer, looking away from him. I can't refuse, not when he's just got back and is already suspicious.

We walk into the cafeteria and he lets me go in front of him in the line while he asks where my Mom is. I tell him how she got a new office job down the road and she moved last week. She loves it and it pays a lot better than here. That's why I like that she accepted the offer; she's happier and she would have realised that something was wrong if I stopped coming in to lunch.

After picking up a small pot of salad and bottle of water, I go to the till and pay for it before sitting down opposite Ryder. He looks down at my plate, his eyebrows knitting together.

**Ryder's POV…**

"Is that all you want?" I ask, concerned. Marley usually loves school lunches.

"Yeah.." She tells me. "I'm not that hungry."

Something doesn't seem right, but I don't press the issue. It must just be because I haven't seen her in so long.

**Marley's POV…**

I start making my way through the salad, inwardly groaning at my inability to lie convincingly. I can tell that Ryder knows something is up. I take small bites and a huge gulp of water after each one and I get about half way through it when I feel full. After closing it up again, I throw the carton in the bin, hoping Ryder didn't see how much was left and, thankfully, he didn't seem to. Just then, Blaine and the rest of the New Directions join us. I sneak away after a few minutes of conversation and hurry to the bathroom, desperate to purge my body.

Thankfully the bathroom's empty when I walk in and so it takes me just a few minutes to enter a stall, pull my hair back and kneel on the floor. I then push two of my fingers down my throat until I start to gag but it doesn't work so I add another. After two more tries I manage to get my lunch up and I stare down at it in satisfaction.

Then I hear my name being called from outside.

"Marley?"

**Ryder's POV…**

That can't be her inside that stall. That wasn't natural vomiting, it was definitely forced. Why would she do that to herself? I know she ran off quickly but still…

"Marley?" I repeat quietly. There's no response.

I push on the door and see that it's been left unlocked. What's more surprising though is the trembling girl I see on the floor, looking at me with tear filled eyes. Not knowing what to say, I look down at her, my heart breaking, but then my attention turns to the toilet beside her. Inside I see churned up food and little specks of red.

"Marley! What the hell are you doing?!" I demand, looking straight at her.

She sniffs and rolls her eyes before replying. "What does it look like? I'm getting prettier like Sugar and Brittany and..and Kitty."

I frown. This doesn't seem right. "Marley..Kitty was a bitch to your mom and is horrible to pretty much three quarters of the school, including us sometimes, yet you're harming yourself to be more like her?" I pause. "Why?"

**Marley's POV…**

He looks at me with wide, confused eyes and I let out another sob.

"You don't get it Ryder! You have no idea what it's like to be me; you're popular, handsome and every girl in school wants to date you. It doesn't make sense that you're with me.. the least I can do is try to be good enough for you." I stand up and, after flushing the toilet, turn and walk out of the stall. Ryder comes up behind me as I start to wash my hands in the sink.

"Marley.." He begins. I sigh but don't interrupt "I do know what it's like. My dad is a _doctor_ and I'm a friggin' idiot with dyslexia. I know what it's like to feel as if you're not good enough but Marley, I don't want you ever feeling that way. I don't deserve _you_! You're the kindest person I've ever met, you're breathtakingly gorgeous, and your smile lights up the room. What you don't deserve is being put through this."

I can't stop myself from turning on him then. "For God's sake Ryder!" I exclaim. "So you're daddy will have to pay what he probably classes as 'loose change' to put you through a course. You've finally understood why you've struggled, and you hate feeling like you'll never belong. But at least you do! I have been tormented at _every _school I've been to due to my family and I've never fit in anywhere. My body is the first thing I've been able to control Ryder, and you're not taking this away from me."

I storm out with angry tears in my eyes and it's not until I get down the hallway that I start to regret my words. Stopping myself from returning to apologise, I go to the auditorium and take a seat near the stage.

**Ryder's POV…**

Wow. So that's what she really thinks of me."Don't be stupid!" My head tells me as I step out of the girls' bathroom, earning some strange looks. "She's not well, she needs your help." Agreeing with my thoughts, I hurry over to Miss Pillsbury's office where I find her sitting behind her desk. After knocking and being told to come in, I enter and sit in front of her before telling Marley's secret.

**Hope you liked it! Please leave any thoughts as I'll update when I have reviews :D And please check out my new Pretty Little Liars story!**

**And a shout out to beccalovesbumblebee for reviewing! (And thank you :D)**


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